A man, his wife, and his son all go to a nuude beach. Naturally, the young son has lots of questions. He runs to his father, “Dad! Dad! All of the women have these things hanging from their chests!”

His father tells him, “Son, those are breasts. The women with large ones are dumb and the small ones are smart.”

Soon after the son comes running again, “Mom! Mom! All of the guys have these things dangling between their legs!”

The mom replies, “Those are called p*nis’. The men with the big ones are dumb and the men with small ones are smart.”

A little bit later the son runs up to his mom and asks her, “Mom! Mom! Is being dumb contagious? Dad is talking to a really dumb lady and he keeps getting dumber and dumber.”

The doctor walks over to the window and just stares out of it.
A few moments later, the mother says, “Is there something wrong out there, doctor?”
The doctor replies, “No, not really. It’s just that the last time something like this happened, a star appeared in the East and three wise men came over the hill. I’ll be damned if I’m going to miss it this time!”

But the next day when she came in, she found the same thing again – “penis”, this time written slightly larger. So she rubbed it out again, and went on with the lesson.
Again next day, in larger letters, there was the word “penis” again. With a red face she rubbed it out and went on with the lesson.
Well, this went on for a whole week, every day the word penis getting bigger.
Finally, on Friday she went into the classroom to find chalked up: “See, the harder you rub it, the bigger it gets!”

I was sitting in a bar one day and two really large women came in, talking in an interesting accent.
So I said, “Cool accent, are you two ladies from Ireland?” One of them snarled at me, “It’s Wales, dumbo!” So I corrected myself, “Oh, right, so are you two whales from Ireland?” That’s about as far as I remember

to be honest with me.’
‘Ok’ said the boyfriend ‘I fucked your sister’.

A woman with no arms and no legs is sitting on the beach crying.
A man walks up to her and says “What’s wrong?” She replies “I’ve never been hugged before.” The man looks around and gives her a hug.  The next day he encounters the same woman, crying again on the beach. He asks her again, “What’s wrong now?”She says” I’ve never been kissed before.” So the man kisses her, but she starts crying even more. He says “What’s wrong? I thought you wanted to be kissed.” This time she replies “Yea, but I’ve never been f*****d before.” The man thinks for a second, and has an idea. He picks her up by her sides, and throws her as far as he can into the ocean. He yells to her “Well, you’re f*****d now!”

there. Once there the PI hands him a pair of binoculars and points across the street at the neighboring high rise.
There is one of the windows is his wife getting it on with a coworker.

Fuming with rage he says to the PI “how much would it cost me for you to shoot his dick off and blow her brains out?” “I generally charge $100000 A bullet” ” done “

So the PI grabs a black case opens it up and assembles a rifle and then aims down the sights at the window.
After a couple of seconds, he says” you know I reckon I can save you $100 000″