Dirty Jokes

So I took off her bra and panties.
Then she says, “If I ever catch
you wearing my clothes again, I’m
telling mom and dad!”

What was the complaint?
Phil: We haven’t had any yet.

kennel needed to be large enough for the dog to stand up, sit down, turn around, and roll over.
The customer was perplexed: “I’ll never be able to teach him all of that by tomorrow!”
(via gcfl.net)

“Who names a drink ‘Steve?'”

single language, not one, in
which a double positive can
express a negative.”
A voice from the back of the
room piped up, “Yeah, right.”

the exact opposite effect – there is no way you can
enjoy yourself with a man between your legs if you’re thinking, ‘Hmm, Mum’d be proud.’”

of bad luck!”
Condom: “Hahaha…
(Condom walks off laughing)”