Christmas Quotes Aesthetic

Christmas is doing a little something extra for someone. — Charles Schulz

When we recall Christmas past, we usually find that the simplest things, not the great occasions, give off the greatest glow of happiness. — Bob Hope

At Christmas, all roads lead home. — Marjorie Holmes

And that, of course, is the message of Christmas. We are never alone. Not when the night is darkest, the wind coldest, the world seemingly most indifferent… — Taylor Caldwell

Christmas is forever, not for just one day. For loving, sharing, giving, are not to put away. — Norman Wesley Brooks

Christmas is a stocking stuffed with sugary goodness. — Mo Rocca

It’s not how much we give but how much love we put into giving. — Mother Theresa

Funny Christmas Quotes Humor

“My husband’s idea of getting the Christmas spirit is to become Scrooge.”

“A lovely thing about Christmas is that it’s compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.”

“Christmas, here again. Let us raise a loving cup; Peace on earth, goodwill to men, and make them do the washing up.”

“Next to a circus there ain’t nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit.”

“Christmas is a baby shower that went totally overboard.”

“Adults can take a simple holiday for children and screw it up. What began as a presentation of simple gifts to delight and surprise children around the Christmas tree has culminated in a woman unwrapping six shrimp forks from her dog, who drew her name.”

“Nothing’s as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas.”

“I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph.”

Funny Holiday Quotes

“Once again, we come to the holiday season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice.” — Dave Barry

“Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.” —Johnny Carson
“At Christmas, tea is compulsory. Relatives are optional.” —Robert Godden

“I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph.” — Shirley Temple

“Most Texans think Hanukkah is some sort of duck call.” — Richard Lewis

“The proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year’s Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you’re married to.” — P. J. O’Rourke

“Christmas is the season when you buy this year’s gifts with next year’s money.” — Author Unknown

“One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas day. Don’t clean it up too quickly.” — Andy Rooney

Inspirational Christmas Quotes

“I will honor Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year.” – Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol

“Christmas is not a time nor a season, but a state of mind. To cherish peace and goodwill, to be plenteous in mercy, is to have the real spirit of Christmas.” – Calvin Coolidge

“Some Christmas tree ornaments do a lot more than glitter and glow, they represent a gift of love given a long time ago.” – Tom Baker

“The smells of Christmas are the smells of childhood.” – Richard Paul Evans

“The thing about Christmas is that it almost doesn’t matter what mood you’re in, or what kind of year you’ve had–it’s a fresh start.” – Kelly Clarkson

“I love the excitement, the childlike spirit of innocence, and just about everything that goes along with Christmas.” – Hillary Scott

Christmas Quotes Funny

“My husband’s idea of getting the Christmas spirit is to become Scrooge.”

“Adults can take a simple holiday for children and screw it up. What began as a presentation of simple gifts to delight and surprise children around the Christmas tree has culminated in a woman unwrapping six shrimp forks from her dog, who drew her name.”

“A lovely thing about Christmas is that it’s compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.”

“Christmas is a magical time of year…I just watched all my money magically disappear.” 

“Christmas is the season when you buy this year’s gifts with next year’s money.”

Christmas Sayings and Quotes

  • “I’d Rather Shovel Sand Than Snow.”
  • “It’s Beginning to Look a lot Like Christmas.”
  • “I was cold, so I made an igloo.”
  • “Christmas is Coming.”
  • “The world changes when it snows.”
  • “Stay cozy.”
  • “There’s snow place like home.”
  • “The world changes when it snows.”
  • “#Sleigh”
  • “There’s a certain magic that comes with the very first snow. When the first snow is also a Christmas snow, well, something wonderful is bound to happen.”

Winter Captions For Pinterest / Instagram

  • “Have yourself a Merry little Christmas.”
  • “Sweater Weather is Better Together.”
  • “Make it a December to Remember.”
  • “The Best Way to Spread Christmas Cheer is to Sing Loud for All to Hear.”
  • “Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way!”
  • “Ho, ho, ho,  Merry Christmas.”
  • “Keep Calm and Have a Merry Christmas.”
  • “Winter is Coming.”
  • “It’s feeling a lot like Christmas.”
  • “‘Tis the season.”
  • “All is calm, all is bright.”
  • “Christmas will always be as long as we stand heart to heart and hand in hand.”
  • “A silent night, a star above, a blessed gift of hope and love. A blessed Christmas to you!”
  • “Christmas is a day of meaning and traditions, a special day spent in the warm circle of family and friends.”

36 Best Savage Comeback Quotes for Haters

Quotes for Haters

1. Do your parents even realize they’re living proof that two wrongs don’t make a right?

Comeback Quotes for Haters

2. I can’t help imagining how much awesomer the world would be if your dad had just pulled out.

Comeback Quotes for Haters

3. There are some remarkably dumb people in this world. Thanks for helping me understand that.

Comeback Quotes for Haters

4. Haters only hate the things that they can’t get and the people they can’t be.

Comeback Quotes for Haters

5. Haters will talk shit but wanna be where I sit, so lames can envy because I am the top bitch.

Comeback Quotes for Haters

6. Haters; kill them with success and bury them with a smile

Comeback Quotes for Haters

7. B.I.T.C.H: Beautiful Individuals that Create Haters

Comeback Quotes for Haters

8. Do you ever wonder what life would be like if you’d gotten enough oxygen at birth?

Comeback Quotes for Haters

9. Haters stay mad because they can’t have the attention you have!

Comeback Quotes for Haters

10. Rumors are carried by haters, spread by fools, and accepted by idiots.

Comeback Quotes for Haters3

11. Your ass must be pretty jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth.

Comeback Quotes for Haters3

12. Can you die of constipation? I ask because I’m worried about how full of shit you are.

 Comeback Quotes for Haters

13. Were you born on the highway? That is where most accidents happen.

Comeback Quotes for Haters

14. Stupidity’s not a crime, so feel free to go.

Comeback Quotes for Haters

15. I was going to give you a nasty look but I see that you’ve already got one.

Comeback Quotes for Haters

16. Are you always such an idiot, or do you just show off when I’m around?

Comeback Quotes for Haters

17. If you’re waiting for me to care, I hope you brought something to eat, ‘cause it’s gonna be a really long time.

Comeback Quotes for Haters

18. Sometimes it’s better to keep your mouth shut and give the impression that you’re stupid than open it and remove all doubt.

Comeback Quotes for Haters2

19. I don’t believe in plastic surgery,
But in your case,
Go ahead.

comeback Quotes for Haters

20. People like you are the reason we have middle fingers.

Comeback Quotes for Haters

21. Tell me… Is being stupid a profession or are you just gifted?

Comeback Quotes for Haters

22. Dear Haters, I have so much more for you to be mad at. Just be patient.

Comeback Quotes for Haters

23. H: Having
A: Anger
T: Towards
E: Everyone
R: Reaching
S: Success

Comeback Quotes for Haters78

24. Haters would want to kill your dreams just because theirs fell asleep.

Comeback Quotes for Haters9

25. shut up slut the only test you can pass is the pregnancy one.

Comeback Quotes for Haters3

26. Says “I’m going 2 buy u a condom 2 put on Ur head… cause if Ur going 2 act like a dick u may as well dress like one!!!

Comeback Quotes for Haters

27. One sperm says to another,”Let’s see what happens if we let the slow one win!”. That might explain a lot about you.

Comeback Quotes for Haters6

28. I respect you so much I salute you with 1 finger!

Comeback Quotes for Haters

29. Love me or hate me, both are in my favor.
If you love me, I’ll always be in your heart.
If you hate me, I’ll always be in your mind.

Comeback Quotes for Haters2

30. Wow! You have a huge pimple in between your shoulders! Oh wait that’s your face.

Comeback Quotes for Haters

31 .Your family tree is a cactus, because everybody on it is a prick.

Comeback Quotes for Haters

32. Your so ugly when you popped out the doctor said aww what a treasure and your mom said yeah lets bury it.

Comeback Quotes for Haters

33. Out of 100,000 sperm, you were the fastest?

Comeback Quotes for Haters

34 .Why don’t you slip into something more comfortable? Like a coma.

Comeback Quotes for Haters

Always remember…Rumors are carried by haters, spread by fools, and accepted by idiots.

Haters and bullies are always cowards, you know. They like to pick on little guys.

The only thing more frustrating than slanderers is those foolish enough to listen to them.

“Be so good they can’t ignore you.”Friends ask you questions; enemies question you.

True love vs Fake Love – How to identify True love?

नकली प्यार और सच्चे प्यार के बीच 12 अंतर यहां दिए गए हैं

Sara met a guy on one of the social networking sites. They met at a nearby coffee shop and felt attracted to each other. They dated each other for a week and then one fine day, the guy took her to his home where they had sex. From the very next day, the guy started avoiding Sara. The poor girl was very disturbed and heartbroken as she had assumed that the guy was her “Prince Charming” and was serious about their relationship.

In today’s world, you meet someone, you date him / her, watch movies together, hang around and sleep together and it’s over! Then comes the heartbreak and feeling of hatred towards love.

12 Difference between Fake love and True Love


A true lover would have trust, but a fake lover will always doubt. He/she will keep checking your phone again and again.


A true lover will give you freedom; to wear, to hang out with friends but a fake lover will always bound you.

3.Being You

A true lover will accept you as you are and whereas a fake lover will ask to change.


True Love let you give everything from the heart without having a motive. But a fake lover will always look for return for a hidden motive.

5. Feelings

True Love gives you romantic feelings BUT fake love is just ask for sex and more sex.

6. Comparison

True lover will never compare you with other.  True love will look the best into you and will tell you, how you are the best as compare to others. Where as fake lover will tell you, how you are not the best choice for him/her.

7  Publicly Acceptance

True lover will never hesitate to accept you as his/her lover.  True lover will never hesitate to public his/her relationship with you on social media. Where as fake lover will never accept you openly and will use you without knowing others. Fake lover will introduce you as a friend in front of others.

8. Reason to Stay or Leave

True lover will tell you many reason everyday to stay with you  where as fake lover will give many reasons to leave you.

9. Future Plans

True lover will count you in future plans where as fake lover will make plans just for himself/herself.

10. Desire or Love

You will be the desire of fake lover where as  Love for the true lover. Fake lover will desire for you and once he/she will get you his/her feelings suddenly drops. True love once connected with you, it will multiply the love day by day.

11 . Bad Time

If he/she is not the first person to whom you want to call when you are low in your bad time then this is the sign that he/she is not your true love.

12 Marriage Proposal

Fake lover gives you silly reasons to delay the marriage whereas true lover will tell you the future plans to delay the marriage.

13. Kindness

True love is kind; Fake love is cruel.

Teenagers and young people, these days, often make the mistake of finding true love. They get carried away and develop relationships that can be harmful to them and their parents. Most of the young children desire companionship and get into the wrong hands. The parents and caregivers should support the children and guide them about what’s right and what’s not.

Finding genuine love is not an easy task. It takes the time to bloom. True love grows slowly and never dies. True love is “caring for each other.” Real love is deep and long lasting. True love cannot be forced.

So, if you’re into a relationship, find out whether it is true love or the fake one before taking the next step. Think about it!

Read in Hindi Here : Difference Between True Love and Fake Love in Hindi

What is True Love between a man and a woman?

True Love emerges when people of the opposite sexes show the following attributes towards each other:

1. True Love is when you have Trust on your partner, meaning that you don’t feel the need to check their personal messages or their mobile phone every other time.
2. Stalking will never give you a peaceful relationship. Don’t be insecure and give your partner enough space to live their own life.
3. Never doubt your lover on the basis of someone else’s opinion. Don’t judge you partner if somebody else says anything nasty about them. In fact, learn to stand up for your partner and a befitting reply to the gossip mongers.
4. True love is about giving respect, unconditional love and your time to your respective man or woman. Don’t let them feel neglected.
5. If your lover is true to you, then he/she will never keep a check on your social media accounts.

Signs of True Love  from a Man

1. When a boy truly loves you, he would give ample space to hang out with your friends, male or female. There should not be the jealousy factor.
2. If a boy makes you feel special in unique ways like spending time with you often, chatting with you for no reason, pampering you with their love and not with expensive gifts.
3. If your man encourages you, supports you in your trying times, then there is a definitely a sign of pure love.
4. Your man should not be harsh and forceful upon you, he should rather be kind and humble towards you.
5. True love is mad but it should be harmless as well, an aggressive lover, who will not hesitate from hurting his woman, can never be called a True Lover.

Signs of True Love  from a Woman

1. She will hug you, smile at you for no reason.
2. A girl who is in love with you won’t separate you from your friends because she knows that your friends are important for you.
3. If she doubts you on seeing you with your female friends, then this one is surely not the sign of true love. Doubting and getting jealous are two different things.
4. Don’t feel uncomfortable if he doesn’t picks up your call or replies to your message on time. This doesn’t mean that he is cheating on you.
5. If a girl likes you, she will be her original self in front of you and won’t pretend when you’re around. She’ll be honest with her emotions.

“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength while loving someone deeply gives you courage.”

CONCLUSION: The person you love should not be your weakness; he/she should be your strength. In times when love is failing and today’s youth is disgracing the true meaning of love and compassion, stand apart and show the world that True Love still exists.

Related Article:Insulting Quotes for Ex-Boyfriend & Ex-Girlfriend

Statistics about Teenagers and Relationships

61% teens have been “in love”
10% of teens spend more than $450 on prom.
94% of teens believe in true love.
49% of teenagers believe in “love at first sight.
60% of students think that the perception of teenagers in love is “negative” instead of positive.
46% of teens have had a friend “dump them” in favor of hanging out with a boyfriend or girlfriend.
18% of teens admitted that a relationship has negatively impacted relationships with their close friend.
61% of teens say they have been in a relationship.
66% of high school & college students admit to having had their heart broken.
92% of teens want to get married at some point in their lives.

True love vs Fake love Quotes

I don’t hate you. I’m just disappointed.

People wear masks of lies so that they look attractive, so be careful.

Love is blind, but friendship closes its eyes.

Real love is what you feel it. You see it, and you show it! But fake love is just made of words.

Spend your time with those who love you unconditionally, not with those who only love you under certain conditions.

I didn’t fall in love with you; I fell in love with the person you pretended to be.

I miss the old you. The one that cared about me.

A clear rejection is always better than a fake promise.

We all believe that, we can’t buy love even if we are rich enough; but I think no one buys his own property.

“A false love, begins with the eye and soon spills from the eye in pain. Where a true love, begins with the eye, and settles in the heart.”

“Men never forget true love. They always remember all the women they couldn’t have.”

If someone wants you, nothing will keep them away, but if they don’t want you, nothing will make them stay!

Don’t ever fake love anyone just because you’re lonely!

Fake is the new trend, and everyone seems to be in style.

Real love you feel it; you see it; you show it! But fake love is just words.

A fake lover stops loving and caring from the day he knows he’ll never get her…

“True love is knowing a person’s faults, and loving them even more for them.”

“True love is like a pair of socks you gotta have two and they’ve gotta match.”

“True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.”

You said, I love you. I said it too. The only difference is, I didn’t lie to you.

Fake love is worse than real hate.

Royal Enfield Bullet Quotes Status Shayari Punjabi

Jatt bullet te, te bullet 100 te...

Mutiyaar di yaari jatt naal te jatt di yaari bullet naal..

ਮੁਟਿਆਰ ਦੀ ਯਾਰੀ ਜੱਟ ਨਾਲ ਤੇ ਜੱਟ ਦੀ ਯਾਰੀ ਬੁੱਲਟ ਨਾਲ

Mutiyaar mardi jatt te , te jatt marda bullet te..

ਮੁਟਿਆਰ ਮਰਦੀ ਜੱਟ ਤੇ, ਤੇ ਜੱਟ ਮਾਰਦਾ ਬੁੱਲਟ ਤੇ

Jatt bullet te, te bullet 100 te…

ਜੱਟ ਬੁਲੇਟ ਤੇ , ਤੇ ਬੁਲੇਟ 100 ਤੇ..

Jatt bullet te, te bullet 100 te...

Jatt di yaari mutiyaar naal katt, te buleet naal vadh..

ਜੱਟ ਦੀ ਯਾਰੀ ਮੁਟਿਆਰ ਨਾਲ ਕੱਟ ਤੇ ਬੁੱਲਟ ਨਾਲ ਵੱਧ

Mitra di heart beat “dugg dugg”

ਮਿੱਤਰਾ ਦੀ ਹਾਰਟ ਬਿੱਟ “ਦੁੱਗ ਦੁੱਗ “

Mitraa da bullet patti janda mutiyara nu…

ਮਿੱਤਰਾ ਦਾ ਬੁੱਲਟ ਪੱਟੀ ਜਾਂਦਾ ਮੁਟਿਆਰਾਂ ਨੂੰ

Kudi kehndi bullet chadd de…main o kudi hi chadd ti…

ਕੁੜੀ ਕਹਿੰਦੀ ਬੁੱਲਟ ਛੱਡ ਦੇ, ਅੱਪਾਂ ਓ ਕੁੜੀ ਹੀ ਛੱਡ ਦੀ .

Enni kudiya mian ni patiya jinni mere bullet ne patt litiya..

ਇੰਨੀ ਕੁੜੀਆਂ ਮੈਂ ਨੀ ਪੱਟੀਆਂ ਜਿੰਨੀ ਮੇਰੇ ਬੁੱਲਟ ਨੇ ਪੱਟੀਆਂ

Petrol daa vairi aa mera Bullet…

ਬੁੱਲਟ : ਪੈਟਰੋਲ ਦਾ ਵੈਰੀ

Bappu kainda putt krle control..
main kainda bapu main ni hona control jado takk aa meri bullet ch petrol..

ਬਾਪੂ ਕਹਿੰਦਾ ਪੁੱਤ ਕਾਰਲਾ ਕੰਟਰੋਲ ਮੈਂ ਕਹਿੰਦਾ ਬਾਪੂ ਮੈਂ ਨੀ ਹੋਣਾ ਕੰਟਰੋਲ ਜਦੋ ਤੱਕ ਮੇਰੀ ਬੁਲਟ ਚ ਆ ਪੈਟਰੋਲ

ਮੈਂ ਵੈਰੀਆਂ ਦਾ ਵੈਰੀ ਤੇ ਮੇਰਾ ਬੁੱਲਟ ਪੈਟਰੋਲ ਦਾ ਵੈਰੀ

ਸਾਡੀ ਬੁਲੇਟ ਚ Petrol ਤੇ ਅੱਪਾ Out of Control

Funny Short Drinking Quotes – Top Awesome Quotes

Drinking quotes

A drunk man’s words are a sober man’s thoughts.

My boss didn’t know I drank, till one day I came to work sober.


Of course I am gonna drive. I am too drunk to walk.

I went on a diet, stopped smoking dope, cut out the drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks.

Beer is now cheaper than gas, do drink, don’t drive!

A drunk man never tells a lie.

I drink to make other people more interesting.

I only drink on 2 occasions when I’m thirsty and when I’m not

Funny Short Drinking Quotes

Everybody has to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another drink.

Funny Short Drinking Quotes

I use to think drinking was bad, so I stop thinking.

Funny Short Quotes

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

Funny Short Drinking Quotes

May be man’s worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

Funny Short Drinking Quotes

Milk is for babies. When you grow up you have to drink beer.

Funny Short Drinking Quotes

If you were on fire with a bucket of water near you, I’d drink the water.

Beer will save the world…I don’t know how..but it will.

Save the planet it’s the only one with beer.

There’s no beer in heaven, we might as well drink it here.

I have a drinking problem… I can’t find my beer.

Parent says don’t drink Friends says don’t drink Cops says don’t drink Are they saving it for themselves?

Funny Graduation Quotes

20 funny graduation quotes
  1. “I can’t believe I’m finally done with pretending to pay attention.”
  2. “Congratulations to the class of ‘insert year here.’ We survived all-nighters and questionable cafeteria food.”
  3. “Now that I’ve graduated, my parents can stop referring to my education as an ‘investment.'”
  4. “Goodbye, assignments. Hello, existential crisis.”
  5. “I’m officially a graduate, which means I can finally trade in my sweatpants for… well, fancier sweatpants.”
  6. “I graduated with honors: honors of never wanting to take another exam again.”
  7. “They say the best years of your life are in college. Clearly, they’ve never had to pay off student loans.”
  8. “Dear diploma, you can’t tell me what to do anymore!”
  9. “I didn’t choose the graduation cap, the graduation cap chose me… to hide my bedhead.”
  10. “Four years of hard work, determination, and avoiding eye contact with the professor when they ask a question.”
  11. “I may be graduating, but I’ll always be a student of procrastination.”
  12. “Finally, I can put ‘professional student’ on my resume.”
  13. “Don’t cry because it’s over; smile because you’ll never have to do homework again.”
  14. “Now that I’ve graduated, I’m one step closer to becoming the person my parents always warned me about.”
  15. “I didn’t graduate with honors, I graduated with Netflix.”
  16. “Thanks, college, for teaching me the art of balancing a social life and a hangover.”
  17. “They say the real world is tough. I say, bring it on… after a nap.”
  18. “I didn’t just graduate; I unlocked the achievement for surviving adulthood.”
  19. “It’s not the end; it’s just the beginning of googling everything I don’t know.”
  20. “Congratulations to my fellow graduates. May we all find jobs that pay in actual money, not just exposure?”

21 Insulting Quotes for Ex Boyfriend & Ex Girlfriend

Insulting Quotes for Ex

Have you broken up with your boyfriend or girlfriend and are no longer on talking terms with them, but sometimes you want to take out your anger and frustration on your exes and you are unable to find the right words so that you can feel light by using some cuss words to lighten your mood. Go through the below-given quotes to help you out for insulting your ex and feel relaxed by spoiling their mood so that they can understand the value of losing you.

Insulting Quotes for Ex

“Dear EX…I won’t block you, or delete you. I’m keeping you there, so you’re able to see how happy I am without you.

Insulting Quotes for Ex

“An “EX” is called an “ex” because it’s an EXample of what you shouldn’t have again in the future.”

Insulting Quotes for Ex

Definition of Ex? = Thanks for the EXperience. Our time has EXpired. Now EXit my life.

Insulting Quotes for Exd

You are just like fart. Your presence stinks.

Insulting Quotes for Ex

I would slap you but slapping you might make my hands dirty as you’re a shit.

Insulting Quotes for Ex

When your ex says “you’ll never find anyone like me” Just smile and reply “that’s the point”.

Insulting Quotes for Ex

Dear Ex ; you are the reason why I know I deserve so much better.

Insulting Quotes for Ex

Insulting Quotes for Ex-Girlfriend

Ex-girlfriends are like tattoos they hurt you & never go away.

Insulting Quotes for Ex Boyfriend & Ex Girlfriend

Never feel bad about she left you. Smile that she is with an asshole now.

Insulting Quotes for Ex Boyfriend & Ex Girlfriend

If you were a vegetable, you’d be a CABBITCH.

Insulting Quotes for Ex-Girlfriend

My inner soul says that the person you are is a human version of a bitch.

Insulting Quotes for Ex-Girlfriend

“When an Ex-Girlfriend says, “Let’s be friends”, it is almost like a kidnapper saying, “we’ll stay in touch.””

Insulting Quotes for Ex-Girlfriend

She is so beautiful why would I hate her but the fact is she is a bitch too and beautiful bitches bite even harder.

Insulting Quotes for Ex-Girlfriend

A good way to breakup with your girlfriend is to introduce her as your ex girlfriend at parties. It softens the blow.

If I had a girlfriend, she would be incredibly offended by me saying, ‘I don’t have a girlfriend’, so that’s the proof.

Insulting Quotes for Ex-Boyfriend

“My ex wasn’t an asshole. He was the whole ass.

Insulting Quotes for Ex

My mother said to donate my old toys for poor kids and that’s why I left him for you bitch.

Insulting Quotes for Ex-Boyfriend

And when you left me for some other girl, I realized why people go for cheaper products instead of classy ones

Insulting Quotes

“If it looks like a dick and acts like a dick, it’s probably my ex-boyfriend.”


“My boyfriend isn’t allowed to watch animal planet. He might see his ex on there.


“Today is national animal day. Please take a moment to remember your Ex Boyfriend.”

“Are you telling her the same shit you told me?”

“If it looks like a dick and acts like a dick, it’s probably my ex-boyfriend.”

You have the perfect face for radio.

No, no, I’m not insulting you I’m describing you.

Why don’t you check up on eBay and see if they have a life for sale.

“why don’t you go to Walmart and get a new personality because clearly the one you got from k-mart has expired.

That awkward moment when you change your Facebook status to ‘single’ and your ex likes it.

I hope you are good at algebra, ’cause you have to replace my X without asking Y.

“I love my ex so much I printed out all his pictures. After all, I need him for target practice. And I just love customized toilet paper and doormats. My only regret is that those items don’t bear his autograph.”