Funny Jokes Hilarious Adult Humor

What’s better than a hilarious joke? A hilarious joke that’s filled with smut and innuendo, of course. And have we got some great dirty jokes for you.

From naughty gags to close-to-the-knuckle toilet humor, look no further. Short rude jokes, jokes, chat-up lines, Rude knock-knock jokes.

What Kind of People Will Not Succeed In Life?

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People who don’t have social connections.
    People who are academically smart, but are utter idiots in life.
    People who are not willing to fail.
    People who won’t let go of their ego and kill it.
    People who are not willing to leave the past behind, cut it off, and move on.
    People who are friends with negative assholes that constantly bring them down because “you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”
    “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” You won’t succeed if you won’t change your attitude, and instead will be desperately trying to change the world, the environment, and others.
    “Those who have a why to live, can bear with almost any how.” If you don’t have a why, game over.  

When A Doctor Was Having an Affair with his a Nurse.

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she asked. He replied, “Just send me a postcard and write ‘spaghetti’ on the back.
I’ll take care of expenses.” Not knowing what else to do, the nurse took the money and flew to Italy.

Six months went by and then one day the doctor’s wife called him at the office and explained, “Dear, you received a very strange postcard in the mail today from Europe, and I don’t understand what it means.” The doctor said, “Just wait until I get home and I will explain it to you.”

Later that evening, the doctor came home, read the postcard, fell to the floor with a heart attack.
Paramedics rushed him to the ER. The lead medic stayed back to comfort the wife.
He asked what trauma had precipitated the cardiac arrest.

So the wife picked up the card and read, “‘Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti – Two with sausage and meatballs, two without.'”