What’s better than a hilarious joke? A hilarious joke that’s filled with smut and innuendo, of course. And have we got some great dirty jokes for you.
From naughty gags to close-to-the-knuckle toilet humor, look no further. Short rude jokes, jokes, chat-up lines, Rude knock-knock jokes.
“well gee, I guess lets here the good news first.”
So the lawyer said “You’re wife has found a picture worth One Million dollars.”
The client replied, “Oh that’s fantastic! But whats the bad news?”
“It’s a picture of you and your secretary.”
‘It’s square and it has you picture on it.’
The driver finally found a square mirror in her purse, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman. ‘Here it is,’ she said.
The Blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, “OK, you can go. I didn’t realize you were a cop…”
me!!” “Oh please?” the girlfriend asked again, in a sexy little voice…
“Really, I can’t,” he replied.“My wife loves this beard!!”
The girlfriend asked once more, he sighed and finally gave in.
That night James crawled into bed next to his wife while she was sleeping.
Husband wife and their loversThe wife was awakened, turned toward him, felt his face, and said,
“Oh Michael, you shouldn’t be here. My husband will be home soon!”
calls out.
“Oh yes,” says the detectorist. He reaches into his bag and pulls out a ring. “I found this engagement ring. The owner lost it when she was cheating on her fiance.”
The man laughs, “That’s a nice ring and a nice story. What else do you got?”
The detectorist presents another ring. “This ring belonged to a married woman. She also lost it while having s3x with another man on this beach.”
“Sure buddy,” said the man, “I should’ve listened to my wife.”
“Maybe,” says the detectorist as he pulled out another ring, “and while you’re at it, give this back to her.”
A look of shock comes over his face.
“Relax,” says the detectorist, “she only gave me head.”
Drunk Blonde A drunk blonde woman was sitting at a bar says to the barman, “Barfender, I’d like a marhini for my heartburn.” The barman mixes her drink and puts in down in front of her. A few minutes later, she calls him over and says, “Barfender, I’d like a marhini for my heartburn.” He rolls his eyes but mixes her drink anyway and sets it down in front of her. A few minutes later, she waves him over again and says, “Barfender, I’d like a marhini for my heartburn.” The barman looks her up and down and says, “First off, it’s bartender, not barfender. Second off, it’s martini, not marhini. And third, you don’t have heartburn, your b**b is in the ashtray.”
she was going down on me. I
thought to myself, “I really
need a new fucking boat.”
I thought to myself.
a talking tree, but you will dialogue.”