Category: Funny Jokes Hilarious Adult Humor

What’s better than a hilarious joke? A hilarious joke that’s filled with smut and innuendo, of course. And have we got some great dirty jokes for you.

From naughty gags to close-to-the-knuckle toilet humor, look no further. Short rude jokes, jokes, chat-up lines, Rude knock-knock jokes.

In 1990, a person is 15 years old

Answer: The person was born in 2005 B.C. (Before Christ).Therefore, he was 5 years old in 2000 B.C, 10 in 1995 B.C, and 15 in 1990 B.C.

Read More

Man Meets his Tinder Date

GUESS-Your-WEIGHT booth and she wins… nothing… The vendor has a good memory.“What now?” he asks, a bit annoyed at the repeat activity. She looks at the man, holding his gaze and carefully says “I. Wanna. Get. WEIGHED.”He ends the date right there and storms off. Dejected, the girl goes home to her roommate, who asks,…

Read More

Thanos walks into a barber shop

Read More

In Front of The Doctor

I’m afraid you’re going tohave to stop m@sturbating.”“I don’t understand, doc,” the patient says. “Why?”“Because,” the doctor says.“I’m trying to examine you.”

Read More

The Clever blonde in school

Next day the blonde came…home and went to her mother and said, “Today in school we learned our ABCs! The other kids could only get to D but I can get to K! …. A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K!”The mother says, “Very good honey.” The blonde then asked. “Is…

Read More

When Old Man is Selling Watermelons

An old man is selling watermelons. His pricelist reads: 1 for $3, 3 for $10 A young man stops by and asks to buy one watermelon. “That’d be 3 dollars”, says the old man. The young man then buys another one, and another one, paying $3 for each. As the young man is walking away,…

Read More

An Assassin is Running Towards Trump

bodyguard and says “ Thank you, butwhy did you yell Mickey Mouse”The bodyguard replies “Sorry Sir,I meant to say Donald, Duck.”

Read More

German Man Saved the Dog

off, and he’ll be fine.”“Are you a vet?” I asked.He replied, “Vet?… I’m fucking soaking.”

Read More

When Soldier Need Nun’s Help

crawled out from under her skirt and said, “I can’t thank you enough, sister. You see, I don’t want to go to Syria.” The nun said, “I understand completely.” The soldier added, “I hope I’m not rude, but you have a great pair of legs!” The nun replied, “If you had looked a little higher,…

Read More

The hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squires of the other two hides.

and the Elephant Squire had ten sons, but the Hippo Squire was childless. The Lion Squire and the Elephant Squire sent there eighteen sons to kill the Hippo Squire, but the Hippo Squire drew his sword and single-handedly slaughtered all eighteen of them. And thus, it was proven once and for all that the squire…

Read More

When Professor, a CEO, and a Janitor go to the Jungle

so he is teleported to a restaurant. After about an hour, all the annoying customers drive him insane, so he smashes his plates on the ground and gives up. The janitor says “I’ll be an artist” so he is transported to an art facility. He glues all the classroom supplies and shattered plates to a…

Read More

Dad is listening to his daughter say her prayers before bedtime.

bedtime,the daughter says – God bless mommy and daddy. And goodbye grandma.Sure enough, the next day grandma breathes her last earthly breath. The dad realizes this is more than a coincidence, but he is not sure what to do.He doesn’t want to disturb his wife by telling her (Grandma and grandpa were her parents).Months go…

Read More

Son Telling Mom About Kiss

He suddenly shouted and said look mom, They are fighting for CHEWING GUM.

Read More

The Perfect Size ?

He goes home and eats his lunch. Then he sees his dad on the couch. He goes up to his dad and ask him, “What is a penis?” The dad whips his out and says to the boy, “This is a penis, as a matter of fact this is the perfect penis.” The boy leaves…

Read More

Man gets hilarious reply from Smoker kid

stunned, but plows forwardand asks, “Is your dad home?” The kid replies, “What thefuck do you think?”

Read More