When a Sinner Man Confesses

talking but kept weeping. “Well don’t cry, it’s a sin but it is not that bad. You shouldsay 5 Hail Marys and it will be forgiven”. Said the priest. “But it doesn’t end there” the man kept sobbing. “a few days later my elderly neighbor asked me to help her with her computer. Her husband…

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Man Throws Her into the Ocean

The next day, the man sees the woman, on the deck, crying again. The man says “What’s wrong, now?” The woman says “I’ve never been kissed before.” So, the man gives her a kiss and walks away. The next day, the same thing occurs. The man says “Oh, for Christ’s sake! What’s wrong, this time?!”…

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Try to Change Wife Not Topic

Husband comes home early and sees wife with another guy.Wife : Why are you early ?Husband : Who is he ?Wife : Don’t try to change the topic..!

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He knows how to make someone feel guilty.

The guy then responded with a loud voice: “$1000 FOR ONE NIGHT? THAT’S TOO MUCH!” All the people in the library looked at the girl in shock. The guy whispered “I guess you felt bad for what you did earlier, right? I study law; I know how to make someone feel guilty.”

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The Bears Were Looking For a New Quarterback

63 CNN he saw a war-zone scene in Afghanistan . In one corner of the background, he spotted a young Afghan Muslim soldier with a truly incredible arm. He threw a hand-grenade straight into a 15th story window 100 yards away. KABOOM! He threw another hand-grenade 75 yards away, right into a chimney. KA-BLOOEY! Then…

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Dump boy in Ice cream shop

the chocolate we’re out of,”Kid: “Ah, OK. Then gimme a scoop of raspberry and a scoop of chocolate.”Clerk: “Listen, kid, can you spell the VAN in vanilla?”Kid: “Sure! V-A-N.”Clerk: “Can you spell the STRAW in strawberry?”Kid: “Sure! S-T-R-A-W!Clerk: “Can you spell the FUCK in chocolate?”Kid: “There is no FUCK in chocolate!”Clerk: “THAT’S what I’m trying…

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3 Women In the Bar Deciding Nick Names for Husbands

Three Women Were Sitting In A Bar Enjoying A Drink. They Got To Talking And Found Out That All Of Their Husbands Were Named Bubba. The First Woman Says, “We Need To Come Up With Nick Names For Our Husbands So We Know Which Bubba We’Re Talking About. The Third Woman Says, “I’Ll Call My…

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Difference between a wife, a nymphomaniac, and a hooker

says,… “Are you done yet?” And the wife says,“Beige, I think I’ll paint the ceiling beige.”

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80-year-old Farmer Married 21 Year Woman

he also doesn’t want the farmer to lose his second wife, so hesuggests to the farmer, “You know, if you want your farm to bemore successful, maybe you should hire a 21-year-old farmhand.” “That I’ll do!” says the farmer. A few months later, the farmer comes back and says to the bartender, “I have some…

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Gift for sweetheart

Nordstrom and bought a pair of white gloves. The sister purchased a pair of panties for herself. During wrapping, the clerk mixed the items up and the sister got the gloves instead. Without checking the contents, the young man sealed the package and sent it to his sweetheart with this note:“I chose these because I…

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He Thought He Blew A Seal

waits, the penguin goes to an ice cream shop and ordersa big sundae to pass the time. The penguin isn’t the neatest eater and he ends up covered inmelted ice cream. When he returns to the shop, the mechanic takes one lookat him and says, “Looks like you blew a seal.” “No,” the penguin insists,“it’s…

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Why Su & Fu Decided to Stay in China ?

A Chinese family of 5, named Chu, Bu, Hu, Su and Fu decided to immigrate to the United States. In order to get a visa, they had to adapt their names to American standards. Chu became Chuck. Bu became Buck. Hu became Huck. Su and Fu decided to stay in China!

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In 1990, a person is 15 years old

Answer: The person was born in 2005 B.C. (Before Christ).Therefore, he was 5 years old in 2000 B.C, 10 in 1995 B.C, and 15 in 1990 B.C.

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Man Meets his Tinder Date

GUESS-Your-WEIGHT booth and she wins… nothing… The vendor has a good memory.“What now?” he asks, a bit annoyed at the repeat activity. She looks at the man, holding his gaze and carefully says “I. Wanna. Get. WEIGHED.”He ends the date right there and storms off. Dejected, the girl goes home to her roommate, who asks,…

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In Front of The Doctor

I’m afraid you’re going tohave to stop m@sturbating.”“I don’t understand, doc,” the patient says. “Why?”“Because,” the doctor says.“I’m trying to examine you.”

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